Blood in the Water
by Umei no Mai
Summary: This was not the plan, okay? It wasn't! Shisui however can't quite bring himself to care, not when he's just been rescued from certain maiming by the most magnificently well-muscled kunoichi he's ever met. [Crack. Fix-it. Behold the chaos! Uchiha Shisui is Hoshigaki Shizuma's father, there is no other explanation for the Boruto bishonen sharkboy. DoS compliant. Random updates.]
1. Chapter 1

For Izzy and the lovely people on the DoS Discord, who agree with me that Hoshigaki Shizuma looks _far _too much like Uchiha Shisui to not be his son.

* * *

**Blood in the Water **

_This_ was not the plan.

This was _not_ the plan!

Then again, Danzo trying to steal his eye _and using Izanagi_ hadn't exactly been the plan either. Shisui flopped back against the tree behind him and tried to take stock, ducking absently under the blade of a blank-masked Root ANBU and trapping him in a genjutsu.

Fact the first: Danzo had just tried to steal his sharingan.

Fact the second: Danzo _already had_ at least one sharingan to have used Izanagi like that, and given that he only had one spare eye-socket Shisui shuddered to think where any other eyes might be.

Fact the third: Shisui would probably have lost his Kotoamatsukami to the eye-stealing elder had a distinctly familiar Hoshigaki not charged into the clearing at _exactly the right moment_ and punched Danzo through a tree.

'Distinctly familiar' because on that mission to Water Country six months ago he'd been very happily seduced by a stunning seven-foot-tall, blue-skinned kunoichi with the most awesome muscles _ever_ and amazing ice-blue eyes that he'd met in a bar, and the roaring blood-spattered berserker currently ripping Root agents apart with her bare hands and throwing half the Naka River at Danzo had the same chakra as his three-night-stand.

One night would not have been enough, seriously. _Three_ nights hadn't been enough, but he'd been on a deadline.

At this rate they were going to attract ANBU. And the entire Uchiha police night shift. And every jōnin in the village, provided they weren't all on their way here already. His glorious rescuer was not remotely subtle.

Shisui is a little bit embarrassed he can't remember the lovely lady's name.

Danzo is launched through another tree –yikes, eyes in his arm but wow, look at the lady's _biceps_– and then his gallant saviour turns towards him for the first time and Shisui gets an eyeful –both eyes full, he still has both eyes even if one is a bit bruised– of the curve of her belly.

"You're _pregnant_?" Did he squeak?

The bloodrage rictus softens slightly. "Obviously, Pretty-boy. That's why I'm _here_." She sniffs, body gliding gracefully into a slightly different stance as she steps sideways to loom protectively in front of him as an ANBU squad blur past. "Good thing I was too; I thought Kekkai Genkai persecution was just a Kiri thing."

"It's complicated?" Shisui offers faintly, trying not to do anything undignified about the implication that he had _knocked up _this glorious ocean goddess and she had _come looking_ for him. She had _left her village_ for him.

"Make it simple, Pretty-boy." Oh wow, even sharingan-perfect memories of her smile don't do the real thing justice.

"People think my clan set up the Kyuubi attack and segregated us and now my family are all angry about it?" Shisui tries, aware that the only reason they're not fighting Danzo right now is that the ANBU patrol that has descended on the scene is led by Wolf-taicho, who has seen the bruises on Shisui's face and the elder's eye-arm and has taken full offence at the councilman's continued existence. Shisui had _known_ that taicho cared!

His magnificent rescuer snorts. "And who set _that_ up?" She demands, unimpressed. "If the village looks bad, you don't stick around; you _leave_, Pretty-boy. Plenty of places to disappear to." She grins down at him, those lovely eyes full of fondness underpinned with bloodlust. "I know a few nice islands big enough to fit a clan on, so long as you don't mind fish."

"My name's Shisui," Shisui manages; "Uchiha Shisui."

The grin somehow turns even toothier. "I know that, Pretty-boy. Shunshin no Shisui; you freaked out one of our top ANBU captains just by showing up where he could see you, did you know that?"

"No?" Shisui had _not_ known that and _wow_ is his reputation even scarier than he'd thought it was.

"So here I am," she rumbles, chakra dark and cold as the depths on the ocean but also distinctly smug. "Making sure you stay all in one piece so I can drag you to bed again."

"Sure!" Shisui agrees, transfixed by pointy teeth, bulging blue muscles and the liberal splatter of the blood of her enemies. And that faintly curving belly; _oh I knocked up a foreign kunoichi on a mission Fugaku-sama is going to __**skin**__ me_…

"Introduce your friend," Wolf-taicho asks blandly, materialising out of the shadows like he hasn't been lurking there since the fracas ended thirty seconds ago.

"Er–"

"He didn't ask my _name_," his blue-skinned goddess says amusedly, "and his pickup lines are terrible, but I like a man who can look at me and say, 'wow, you could break my spine with your thumb, can I buy you a drink?' so I went with it. I don't get propositioned by many people this pretty."

Shisui _knows_ his face is scarlet right now.

"Hoshigaki Aozame," she adds casually, one hand dropping to caress the curve of her abdomen, "hopefully soon to be Uchiha Aozame."

"Yes! Please?" Shisui blurts out.

Wolf-taicho cocks his mask at Shisui, as if to say, _really? _But Aozame –his gloriously muscled sea goddess– thows her head back and laughs.

"Oh yes, Pretty-boy; I'm not letting you get away from me again. Not after this."

Well all his plans are in ruins and there might still be a coup, but right now Shisui can't quite bring himself to care. The most gloriously deadly kunoichi in the Elemental Nations wants to _marry_ him!


	2. Chapter 2

Lord help me, I'm back on my bullshit... Uchiha Uzume belongs to Pepperdoken.

* * *

**Blood in the Water **

The debriefing takes place in the hospital, mainly because T&I doesn't have any obstetric equipment and an important part of checking Aozame's story is verifying that her baby is indeed Shisui's. Shisui can insist the timing checks out until he's as blue in the face as his gorgeous goddess but nobody's going to listen to him because his judgement is _clearly_ compromised. By the fact that she saved his eye, even without the unfortunate aside that nobody else seems to agree with him on how gloriously beautiful she is.

They have no taste.

This results in Aozame sitting cross-legged on the floor in the pastel-painted obstetric ward in the middle of the night because the chairs are too small and the bed creaked ominously when she tried to put her weight on it, Shisui perched on the bedside table across the room because he refuses to leave her alone after she rescued him from Danzo's eyeball kleptomania and Ibiki sitting on a chair with a clipboard facing a kunoichi who is quite visibly both taller and more heavily-muscled than he is.

Shisui will never, ever be able to look at the head of T&I again without associating him with the pastel stars and kittens and baby birds painted on the walls around them.

"So you discovered you were pregnant with Shisui's child and defected?"

His lovely rescuer snorts, her skin's delicate azure shade slightly washed out by the harsh hospital lighting. "Nothing so dramatic, Interrogator-san. I simply registered my pregnancy with the village and informed them I was retiring to focus on raising my child. My resignation went through, I was honourably discharged and granted suitable paperwork to present to my clan head and whichever local authority I chose to settle down within, so that they would be aware of my presence and could call on me in case of local trouble." She flashes her teeth. "Kiri prefers not to be bothered over trivial things like bandits, you understand. That's a job for the locals."

Shisui realises abruptly that she isn't wearing a forehead protector at all, or any kind of armour or even the grey pinstriped arm-and leg-warmers that are a sign of the Kiri establishment having terrible fashion sense. All she's got on is the sleeveless black under-armour that a lot of Konoha shinobi also wear, the ANBU especially. She's not even wearing _sandals._

"And where is this paperwork?"

"In my bag, which your men have no doubt found already and are even now going through," Aozame replies cheerfully. "I'd like the sword back please, it's a family heirloom, and I haven't read all the novels yet."

"Did you inform your village of the paternity of your child?"

She snorts. "Ha. Do I look that stupid? I told my mother, of course, but she gave me her old sword and told me to go catch myself a husband, so." She glances at Shisui and grins again. Shisui grins back, dizzy with delight. His future mother-in-law _approves_ of him!

"You told your mother."

Aozame nods. "I wanted her blessing to leave the clan, for my child's sake. She agreed it would be good for the Hoshigaki to have blood elsewhere, should Kiri continue to be stupid about bloodline clans. Well, stupid_er_."

That makes sense to Shisui; if Aozame settles here, that will show that Konoha is open to other Hoshigaki joining her. Not shinobi of course –taking in missing-nin is perhaps a political statement too far– but other clan-members. Mothers with young children. Elders.

Evidently Ibiki decides that the political unrest in Kiri is a subject for another day, as he asks a different question: "Why did you infiltrate the village?"

His ocean goddess frowns. "Infiltrate? I just came in the normal way."

Shisui raises an eyebrow. "You walked in through the gates?" And nobody _noticed?_

She shakes her head. "I swam up the river, _obviously_."

… That's the _normal_ way?

Wait, does that mean there _isn't_ any security on the river stopping enemy shinobi from doing just that? Clearly Ibiki has had the same thought, because now he looks peeved. Not that it's obvious to anybody who doesn't know him; to the uninitiated Ibiki always looks like he's enjoying your pain.

The door opens and the medic from earlier walks in, Uzume-ba stalking at her heels. Her shirt is inside-out and her hair looks like she just rolled out of bed, but her sword is on her belt and she _glares_ at Shisui fiercely enough to peel paint. Shisui abruptly remembers that he knocked up an out-clan –a _foreign_– kunoichi and tries to blend in with the paintwork.

He's doomed to failure. His uniform is neither pastel nor floral.

"_You_," Uzume-ba hisses, glaring at him as she advances, "are in _so much trouble_."

"I'm sorry!" Shisui squeaks, shrinking in on himself. "I swear I didn't know or I'd have done something sooner!"

"You nearly lost your _eye_, Shisui! To a _village elder_!"

Oh. Yes. That. Uzume-ba instantly notices his distraction, eyes narrowing. "What did you _think_ I was scolding you for, Shisui?"

"Er–"

"Pretty-boy, the nurse has just confirmed for Interrogator-san that my unborn has Uchiha gene markers," Aozame says calmly, watching Uzume-ba with unconcealed interest.

Uzume-ba glances at the stunningly muscled kunoichi and the visible curve of her stomach –because retired or not Aozame is _definitely_ a kunoichi– then back at Shisui, her chakra rising in affront.

"Shisui, you did _not._"

Shisui cringes. "I er, kind of, er, did?"

Uzume-ba grabs him by the ear and _twists._ "Shisui how could you be so _irresponsible_?!"

"Ow ow ow ow!" Then suddenly he has been released and Uzume-ba has her hand on her sword; across the room Aozame is standing; the space between them doesn't look like much at all anymore.

"Is this your shishō, Pretty-boy?"

Shisui hesitates, glancing at Ibiki, who seems fine standing back and watching events unfold. Something about how his bloodthirsty goddess says that suggests that is a loaded question. "She took me in and trained me after my parents died and let me sign her summons contract," he says carefully. "Uzume-ba, this is Hoshigaki Aozame; she saved my eyes." That means a lot among Uchiha. "Aozame, this is Uchiha Uzume, my aunt."

Aozame smiles, the expression delighted and fierce. "So I get to win your hand properly; excellent." Her eyes flick to Uzume. "As soon as your village gives me back my sword I'm going to fight you for him."

Shisui is _conflicted_. On the one hand, the idea of this gorgeous goddess fighting Uzume-ba for his hand in marriage is… wow, is _this_ what it's like being a princess in all those samurai movies? On the other, no matter how skilled his aunt is he knows Aozame has _vastly_ more chakra and raw strength at her disposal. He's not sure of her rank, but she just ripped half a Root platoon limb from limb and punted Danzo around like a bouncy ball, so she's at _least_ a toku-jou.

"Yes, definitely," Uzume-ba says firmly, eyeing Aozame with guarded interest. Shisui widens his eyes at his beautiful saviour and presses his palms together in supplication.

"Oh most glorious goddess of war, please don't kill my Uzume-ba?"

"If you'd rather I didn't, I won't," Aozame agrees easily with a reassuring flash of pointy teeth. "Just got to break a few bones, maybe mangle a kidney so she can't keep up when I carry you off afterwards." She eyes the older woman assessingly. "Konoha's medics are better than Kiri has, right?"

"Much better," Uzume-ba agrees sharply, "and I certainly won't be holding back." Her eyes drop to Aozame's abdomen. "Much," she concedes grudgingly.

"Good, I can't prove I'm good enough to keep him if you don't take me seriously."

"Is this a Kiri thing?" Shisui asks, frantically trying to smother the mental images that arise when his delectable seven-foot goddess talks about _carrying him off_ and _keeping him_. Uzume-ba is _right there_ and she will _notice_.

"More a Hoshigaki thing," Aozame concedes, "but other clans do it too. You've got to show you're strong enough to keep what's yours, or else others might try to steal it." Her chakra rises, cool, liquid and implacable, filling the room as effortlessly as a high tide and receding just as easily. "You are _mine_ and I won't have _anyone_ thinking I won't kill them for touching you."

Shisui wonders hazily what it was he _did_ in his past life that was so amazingly virtuous that this time around he gets rewarded like _this_. Was he a saint?


	3. Chapter 3

The Perpetrator and Uchiha Tokimi also belong to Pepperdoken, and can be found in 'The Perpetrator' on Ao3.

* * *

**Blood in the Water **

Ibiki gives Shisui a temporary discharge from ANBU on the grounds of compassionate leave, both to help the mother of his child settle in on Uchiha clan grounds –which she gets an exemption for seeing as she's pregnant with an Uchiha baby despite not being Uchiha herself– and, Shisui suspects, to keep him away from the rest of Root until the organisation has been properly nailed to the floor and Danzo with it.

Provided Danzo is indeed still alive; Wolf-taicho probably wouldn't have paused to banter unless the elder was either fully incapacitated or outright dead.

Maybe he can ask Itachi about that later?

"So where to, Pretty-boy?"

Shisui beams up at his magnificent goddess –fiancée? He did ask her to marry him and she said _yes_ so she's his _fiancée_ now– and offers her his arm. "Now I get to show you my home," he says happily.

Uzume-ba snorts quietly. "I don't think the flat is big enough, Shisui."

Shisui opens his mouth to counter this and pauses. _Is_ the flat big enough? Scratch that; are the ceilings _high_ enough?

… Probably not. It's not like Konoha architecture was designed with Hoshigaki in mind and the only Konoha clan whose members tend towards unusually large are the Akimichi. Shisui's never seen Akimichi buildings but he guesses they've got higher ceilings than average.

"If you state your intent to marry to the clan head, you will be offered a house," Uzume-ba says, having mercy on him. "I only share that flat with mom because there's no point in a single field shinobi owning a property when it's going to just get dusty all the time."

Oh great, so he has to confess his misdeeds to Fugaku. "It's the middle of the night," Shisui says virtuously, even though it is now well past false dawn. "I should wait until after breakfast at least."

Uzume-ba and Aozame snicker in unison. It's so nice that the two most important women in his life are getting along.

* * *

His azure goddess does indeed have to duck to get inside the front door of the flat, and Shisui then has to spend a rather frantic fifteen minutes explaining himself to Tokimi-baa, who is already awake and _not impressed_. Tokimi-baa is in the Uchiha Military Police, so the power of her Unimpressed Face is considerable; Aozame crouches on the floor, happily petting The Perp as the cat purrs loudly under her massive hands.

The Perp liking Aozame is clearly a significant mark in her favour, as once Shisui has been thoroughly dressed-down –for knocking up a foreign kunoichi, for letting Danzo get the drop on him, for _not running away_ once he realised Danzo was after his Mangekyō– Tokimi-baa turns to his beautiful fiancée –he has a fiancée!– warmly thanks her for looking after 'my idiot grandson' and welcomes her to stay as long as she needs to.

"Oh it was very much my pleasure, Uchiha-san," his goddess says easily. "I _do_ want to keep him around, after all." She grins a little maliciously, "and the only good bloodline thief is a thoroughly dismembered one."

"Call me Tokimi-baa, dear," Tokimi-baa says approvingly. "Now I need to head out for my shift, but please feel free to make yourself at home. Shisui," she turns on him with a glare, "_You_ are going to take yourself to Mikoto-sama once the sun is up and confess your indiscretion so she can have a house arranged for your lovely bride." The glare intensifies. "Because you _are_ going to marry her, _aren't you_?"

"Uzume-san has agreed I can fight her for him once I get my sword back, Tokimi-baa," Aozame rumbles from behind him. The reminder that he is the princess to her gallant samurai makes Shisui go pink; Tokimi-baa raises an amused eyebrow.

"Well I'm sure that will be _very_ well-received," she says dryly. "Shisui, do arrange a bed for the dear girl; pregnant women need their rest and I have no doubt she's been up all night."

Oh. Yes! He should do that!

* * *

Mikoto gives him The Raised Eyebrow when he shows up at the main house after breakfast, but she does agree that arranging comfortable housing for a kunoichi as tall as his bride-to-be is both challenging and very important –and Shisui is _so grateful_ to her for not commenting on the events that led up to his glorious goddess agreeing to marry him– and promises to see to it _personally_. Seeing as there is nothing and nobody that can stop Uchiha Mikoto when she has decided to arrange something, Shisui leaves housing in her capable hands and goes to bed.

Well, he crashes on the couch back at the flat, because Aozame is tall and wide enough to have needed him to move his single bed across the lower edge of Uzume-ba's double bed, jury-rig several sheets and borrow extra blankets from Katori-ji next door.

He's going to have to spend some of his savings on a new bed frame and mattress, as well as custom-fitted sheets. Or else give up and use a futon; he'll still need custom sheets though.

Shisui wakes up to Itachi looming worriedly over him, Sasuke clinging to his brother's sleeve and looking grumpy, which is his way of showing concern. "Hey there," he says cheerfully.

"Shisui-nii, are you okay?" Sasuke demands. "Father dashed out of the house in the middle of the night and he's _still_ not back and mother said one of the village Elders tried to hurt you."

"I'm fine, I got rescued just in the nick of time," he assures them both with a smile.

Sasuke glares at him. "I _knew_ you weren't as strong as Aniki!" He declares. "You had to be rescued like a princess!"

"I," Shisui says with all the dignity he can muster while wearing pyjamas, "am the _prettiest _princess, I will have you know. Which is why I got rescued by a _vision_ of strength and beauty, who punched my aggressor through two separate trees, ripped his minions limb from limb and has agreed to fight Uzume-ba for my hand in marriage."

Both brothers blink owlishly at him in unison. "You're getting married, Shisui?" Itachi asks quietly.

"Yes," Shisui says firmly, "I am. Because the most magnificent kunoichi in the universe wants to marry me."

"Boasting again, Pretty-boy?"

Shisui turns to grin over the back of the couch as Aozame ducks through the bedroom door, still in her black under-armour and bare feet, short hair attractively mussed and The Perp twining happily around one ankle. "I am _never_ going to stop boasting about you," he says fervently.

She smiles warmly, the tips of her teeth just visible. "Aw, you're lovely as a lionfish, Pretty-boy. How about breakfast?"

Shisui bounces to his feet past his dumbstruck guests –and yes that is _exactly_ the right reaction to the beauteous blue-skinned vision of power currently inhabiting the apartment– and heads for the kitchen. "I can cook, I'll make you something!"


	4. Chapter 4

I have fanart! It's called _Fanart of the Lovely Couple_ by tricksterkatartthings on tumblr and it's _adorable_! This chapter is in their honour!

* * *

**Blood in the Water **

Shisui raids the fridge for fresh fish –he will buy more for Tokimi-baa later– and makes a varied and substantial breakfast for the vision of beauty leaning against the kitchen counter and watching him cook with a soft smile. Sasuke and Itachi sit at the table in silence, their confusion palpable.

Evidently they're trying to work out how on earth Shisui managed to get somebody this amazing to look twice at him; he has never been so glad to have needed to go to ground mid-mission in central Mizu and to have picked a shinobi bar to lose possible pursuers in. Of course that mission is classified to the moon and back, but it's not like he has to mention anything more than that he met her in a bar, does he?

Wait a minute… "Sasuke, don't you have school today?" Shisui is fairly sure the Academy is in session most days, in fact.

Sasuke scoffs. "Classes are cancelled," he says, as though it should be obvious to him.

"Why?" Nothing serious has happened while he was asleep, has it?

Itachi stares at him. "Shisui, a shinobi of the village was attacked by his superior officer, with the clear intent to commit bloodline theft. Said shinobi's attempts at self-defence revealed other previous instances of bloodline theft before the culprit was apprehended by ANBU."

"Who–" Shisui asks before his brain catches up with his mouth, "–oh yes, me. I knew that." It sounds really serious when put like that. "Wait, who edited Aozame out of the narrative?" His glorious rescuer should get her due!

Except that would make the village look bad; politics. Bleah.

"Removing Aozame from the narrative reduces scrutiny on your relationship," Itachi says seriously, "and discourages people to question how and when you met her."

"It was a shinobi dive bar on the outskirts of Kirigakure," Aozame says, eyes crinkling teasingly as Shisui hands her a plate piled high with food. "Thank you, Pretty-boy." She moves over to the table and carefully settles herself on the free chair; it creaks, but does not collapse. "And he bought me a drink, talked a bit, then came home with me."

"You let a foreign shinobi into your home?" Itachi looks bemused.

"He was wearing a Kiri headband," the vision of power eating the meal _he_ just made for her says mildly after taking a large bite of fried fish, "and I could tell his intentions were no more nefarious then my own. This is lovely fish, Pretty-boy."

Shisui beams at the admissions that his glorious goddess _likes_ his cooking and had found him just as striking on that first meeting as he had her.

There is a knock at the front door; Shisui opens it to find Mikoto on his doorstep. "Hi there, are you looking for Itachi and Sasuke?"

"Not at this moment, Shisui," Mikoto says calmly, stepping inside and closing the door behind her; Shisui steps back to give her more space. "I'm here to meet your fiancée and explain the housing situation."

"What's there to explain?" Shisui asks worriedly, trailing after her as she strides into the kitchen.

"Ah, it's wonderful to meet you, Hoshigaki-san," Mikoto says warmly, ignoring Shisui entirely as she bows to Aozame. "Thank you for your timely rescue; Shisui is one of our most beloved clansmen."

"It was very much my pleasure," Aozame says quietly, pausing in her meal.

"Oh, please don't stop on my account," Mikoto insists, "do eat; I only came to explain that unfortunately none of the compound's current housing is suitable for a kunoichi of your stature, so we are renovating one of the vacant properties. There are however several to choose from, so once you've finished I'd like to show them to you, so you can choose a location you like."

"Renovating?" Shisui echoes cautiously as his wonderful fiancée takes another bite of the meal _he_ cooked for her. The clan is not rolling in funds; rather the opposite, really. Running the Military Police is a drain on the clan's coffers and with all of them legally required to live within the bounds of the Uchiha compound, they can't afford to run businesses in the wider village anymore.

"Recent events being what they are, the village owes the Uchiha a great debt," Mikoto says archly, giving Shisui The Knowing Smile, "so it will be no trouble at all. Several different Clan Heads have assured my husband of it."

Several different things click together in Shisui's head. "It wasn't just our eyes, was it?"

The Knowing Smile twitches minutely, reforming itself into the Vindictively Pleased Smirk. "It was not. Now be a dear Shisui and go inform T&I that I'd like them to return your fiancée's clothing and personal effects so she can feel presentable for our little tour of the compound."

Shisui is _not_ keen, but he knows better than to defy his Clan Head's wife. "I'll do my best," he promises, turning to smile at Aozame.

His marvellously muscular betrothed reaches across the table, grabs him gently by the collar and pulls him in for a kiss. "I'm sure you will; dainty as a blue-ringed octopus and no less deadly," she rumbles warmly after releasing him.

Shisui flushes delightedly, heart pounding; if she's going to kiss him like _that_ just for agreeing to try, he _definitely _needs to succeed!

* * *

Extracting his goddess's clothes from T&I is remarkably straightforward: he just shows up in Ibiki's office via shunshin –the man glares at him but Shisui can still see visions of stars and pastels in his mind's eye– and has a medium-sized cardboard box and a checklist shoved into his arms. "The list is for the box's contents; have her sign it. She'll get the rest back once we've got her citizenship straightened out."Shisui swiftly peruses the list; various clothing check, toiletries check, sandals check. No books or weapons; understandable as books need to be extensively checked for codes and weapons are for citizens of Konoha only.

"Do I bring it back once it's signed?" no reason not to be helpful after all…

Ibiki glares again, but it's a fake glare this time. Aww, Ibiki was worried about him! "No. Stay out of T&I until you're back on duty again."

"I was never here," Shisui agrees, then uses shunshin to leave again. Success! Now on to receiving his thank you kisses!

He gets _amazing_ thank you kisses. He also gets to help his glorious goddess wash her back in the shower, since being so pregnant apparently makes twisting around like that a bit difficult. Seeing her with water streaming down her bare skin makes him wish Mikoto _wasn't_ waiting outside to take Aozame on a walk around the compound, but she is and so Shisui is sadly going to have to wait until later to worship his goddess properly.

"Joining us, Pretty-boy?" Aozame asks him as she towels off.

"Sure, why not?" This way he can show her off properly to everybody in between her seeing the houses.


	5. Chapter 5

**Blood in the Water **

The Uchiha compound is unusually busy, or at least the bits where Mikoto is showing Aozame around are. Shisui's not at all surprised; it follows that everybody wants a look at his new and lovely fiancée.

"Are all the buildings this new, Uchiha-san?"

"Call me Mikoto please; in a clan this large everybody is Uchiha-san. And yes; the whole of the centre of the village was obliterated during the Kyuubi incident."

Aozame nods. "Mikoto-san. The doors and such being low isn't really a problem, so long as we put in an extra layer or two of transom boards and raise the ceilings accordingly. I'm used to ducking to get into buildings."

"Is that how Kiri does it?" Shisui asks; he's not actually paid much attention to architecture on missions, beyond making sure the roofs are study enough to take his weight.

"It's easier than paying extra for taller wall panels, yes," his glorious goddess says dryly. "Although most clan artisans make taller panels as standard. Village architecture however generally involves very high ceilings and wide doors, but keeps the door openings not much taller than Konoha ones. A lot of shinobi have to duck to get into places." She smiles. "Something about teaching practical habits."

Well it follows that most of the rest of the Elemental Nations do not cater to people as tall as Kiri seems to have, so making sure their shinobi don't knock themselves out walking into doors outside their home village makes sense.

"Then we just have to extend the support beams slightly," Mikoto muses, "or else reduce the space under the roof." She smiles, small and light and pleased. "That will be easy. You just have to decide which house you like best, Hoshigaki-san."

"I'm using your name so you may as well use mine, Mikoto-san," Aozame says, glancing around at their audience of Uchiha all pretending that they're not eavesdropping. "Sasuke-kun, want a shoulder ride?"

The little boy's eyes go very wide. "Yes please Nee-san!"

Aozame scoops him up one-handed and perches him on her shoulder; on _one_ shoulder. Shisui's eyes widen even as he makes note of the surreptitious chakra use sticking Sasuke down so he can't fall off. Itachi twitches, clearly torn between wanting to retrieve his little brother and allowing Shisui's betrothed to continue indulging the boy's desires. Itachi-chan's got such a brother complex…

"It's so high!"

"Hmm," Shisui's awesomely well-muscled beloved agrees lightly. "The view's good, isn't it?"

"I can see super far!" Sasuke agrees eagerly, kicking his heels in delight. "It's so cool!"

"Can you see the next house?" Aozame asks, smiling enough to show off pointy teeth.

"It's this way," Mikoto says, showing off The Fondly Tolerant Smile.

* * *

Aozame decides she likes the house with the pond on the southern edge of the compound best, quietly insists on being allowed to help with the renovations –"I've got nothing else to do at the moment, Mikoto-san"– and then asks Sasuke to show her the best bits of Konoha, since the building work won't start until tomorrow at the earliest. Which of course means Itachi and Shisui have to go out too, because there are cool places in the village that Aozame will enjoy that Sasuke doesn't even know exist, like the shinobi bars and various training grounds, and Shisui can show her those once Itachi sweeps Sasuke off for lunch.

Itachi has no work today, just like Shisui doesn't. That's kind of suspicious actually, but then again the Danzo Drama probably means the Hokage wants to keep both his Uchiha ANBU where he can see them… and where the rest of the Uchiha clan can see them too, to be assured of their continued wellbeing in this trying time.

Which is one of Shisui's reasons for enthusiastically agreeing to show his sea goddess around Konoha; people will be able to see that he's fine and see Aozame as well, both of which are important.

Then Aozame scoops Shisui up onto her other shoulder and his brain shorts out slightly. Yes, he knows she's perfectly capable of manhandling him, but _one-handed_?!

Wow.

"But what about Aniki?" Sasuke asks.

"Pretty-boy, hold Sasuke-kun for a moment?"

Shisui hauls himself together and lifts his little cousin onto his lap, so that his magnificently muscular fiancée can set Itachi on the shoulder that Sasuke was previously occupying. Itachi then takes his little brother back, ostensibly to better balance their weight but mostly because Itachi coddles Sasuke-chan to a ridiculous degree.

Aozame bounces briefly on her toes. "Comfy up there?" She asks, tilting her head up and fluttering her eyelashes at him. Shisui suddenly realises that if she turned her head properly her mouth would press against his thigh and has to swallow a whimper. Oh, he is in _so much_ trouble.

"We are fine, Aozame-san," Itachi assures her, glancing at Shisui in mild confusion. Oh yes, Itachi is only thirteen and puberty hasn't bludgeoned him over the head yet with how indescribably _hot_ it is to be effortlessly manhandled by a kunoichi with biceps bigger than your thighs. And thighs bigger than your _waist_.

He'll get there eventually. Or else it'll be shinobi biceps that catch his eye, probably starting with a brief and mortifying crush on Maito Gai. Shisui has comforted many a kohai through such things; he'll be gentle with his cousin.

"Which way then, Sasuke-kun?"

"Straight ahead!" Sasuke points, leaning forwards and having to be pulled back into Itachi's lap.

Shisui tries to pull himself together as he is effortlessly carried through and out of the Uchiha compound. He needs to be on the lookout for other shinobi who will doubtless try to steal his magnificent ocean queen for themselves; of course she'd never give them the time of day, but he can't stand for such harassment. He needs to think about something other than the fact that his fiancée is carrying him –and Sasuke and Itachi– on her shoulders like he weighs _nothing_ and how far could she throw him? With and without chakra enhancement? Because all this is _without _chakra enhancement and he's–

–distracted. He needs to be less distracted.

Less distracted by how he can feel his glorious goddess breathing, by how her clavicle shifts under his behind as she swings her arms, and how she's so light on her feet that her steps barely jar him. Less distracted by the flexing of her shoulder and arm muscles under his thighs and the solidity of her stomach muscles behind his ankles.

Less distracted by the view of the curve of her pregnant belly through the open front of the haori thrown carelessly over her shinobi blacks and how her short, tousled blue hair is now temptingly within reach.

He's _doomed_.


	6. Chapter 6

**Blood in the Water **

Wolf is not currently on duty, because his completely justified crippling of the elder who tried to commit bloodline theft against his subordinate –who _had_ committed bloodline theft _already_ against his subordinate's clan, against _Obito's_ clan– had led the Sandaime to decide he should take a little downtime.

Wolf had justified his complete lack of hesitance in carrying out said crippling –repeated crippling– by claiming that he'd assumed the elder was an imposter. After all a truly loyal elder of Konohagakure would never even _dream_ of committing such a heinous crime. Would they, Sandaime-sama.

Sandaime-sama had eyeballed him tiredly over his pipe when Wolf said that, but Wolf had survived his insubordination and so had his entire squad, which was what mattered. The entire squad is currently off-duty, but that isn't really a problem for those Anbu who are not Wolf; some of them have lives outside Headquarters. Hawk had left almost immediately, presumably to check up on his cousin and said cousin's surprising new fiancée, Cat had wandered off to commune with nature and Ocelot has a lover so is likely spending time with them.

Ocelot is unlikely to be with the squad for much longer and Hawk is a recent addition, picked up shortly after Robin was removed from Red Team by Danzō and swallowed up by Root. With how things are likely to change in the village, Wolf suspects Hawk may not be Anbu for much longer. Robin… maybe, maybe not. Depends how his marriage goes down; he's more likely to take leave and then come back for a few rotations. There's a number of Anbu who do two on, two off, rotating back into the general forces.

Wolf hasn't left Anbu since joining. He's not planning on changing that any time soon.

He should probably be wearing civvies, but it's been long enough since he had any significant amount of compulsory downtime that Hatake Kakashi only has two outfits that vaguely fit. Which is something he should probably rectify, but he doesn't want to wear either of those outfits right now so here he is, on a rooftop in his Anbu uniform, completely hidden from view and idly watching people pass on the streets laid out below.

Uchiha Shisui's blushing blue bride-to-be is not particularly subtle; Kiri shinobi come in exactly two flavours, quiet and squirrelly as fuck or loudly brash covering up cunning. Hoshigaki Aozame is the latter type: solid, powerful and playing up both to cover up shrewd self-interest. Wolf would be more worried about that if it weren't for the fact that the seven-foot kunoichi has set her sights on being Mrs Uchiha Shisui, as his kohai is fully on board with her ambitions there. Utterly, delightedly and recklessly committed, in fact.

It's vaguely cute in a hair-raising way. As is said kunoichi carrying both of Wolf's Uchiha kohai plus teeny-tiny Hawk-chibi around on her shoulders as she trots this way and that along Konoha's streets, the crowds giving the party a wide berth. Wolf can see Shisui seesawing between pride in his village and frantic lust at his fiancée's brute strength every other minute, which is hilarious.

How did Wolf end up with the only two Uchiha in Anbu as his kohai, when he's pretty sure the entire rest of the clan hate his guts? Truly one of life's mysteries.

Then an orange-and-blond blur collides with Hoshigaki Aozame's knee and Wolf focuses more intensely on the situation unfolding below.

* * *

Shisui pauses in his description of local landmarks as a small child collides with his glorious goddess's shin, bounces back and is caught by the scruff of the neck.

"Watch your step," his magnificent sea nymph says with a sharp-toothed smile.

"Hey whaddayou –hey you're _blue_," the grubby-faced, squinty-eyed blond with unfortunately familiar facial markings says accusingly. "Is there a jutsu that makes people blue?"

"I was born blue, Fox-Face," Aozame says, sounding more amused than offended; her smile widens slightly.

Uzumaki Naruto's eyes open wide, revealing brilliant azure irises. "My name's not Fox-Face, it's Uzumaki Naruto! Oh _wow_ your teeth are super-pointy! Sharper than Kiba's, even! And you're carrying a buncha people around! You're so cool! Are you a shinobi?" His sandals are dangling a good two feet of the ground, but he doesn't seem to care; Shisui supposes he can forgive the volume in light of the demonstrated good taste. "I'm gonna be a shinobi! I'm gonna be Hokage, dattebyo!"

His beautiful blue-skinned fiancée pauses, eyeing the blond brat dangling from her hand. "Uzumaki, huh?"

Shisui abruptly remembers that Uzushio was destroyed by Kiri during the Second War and tenses.

"Yeah!" the brat's all wary defiance, like he's expecting to be dropped now Aozame knows who she is.

"Who're your parents, Uzu-chibi?"

The blond grins, all teeth and no joy. "I'm an orphan, dattebyo!"

Aozame nods understandingly. "Anybody taught you your heritage yet?"

Shisui's eyes widen in alarm.

"What's a heritage, Blue-nee?"

"It's who you are and who your clan is, Uzu-chibi. You're an Uzumaki, and they were from Uzushio and had a bunch of neat jutsu," Aozame rumbles conversationally, like this isn't letting three different cats out of their bags and standing back to enjoy the subsequent fight.

Sure enough, Uzumaki Naruto latches on to the key word with all the force of a rabid mole. "Jutsu? What jutsu Blue-nee? I wanna know! I'm gonna be Hokage I gotta know _all_ the cool jutsu!"

"The Uzumaki are a c_lan_?" Sasuke asks.

"_Were_ a clan, Sasuke-kun," Shisui's lovely fiancée corrects absently, hefting the Kyūbi jinchūriki so he's tucked under one arm, wriggling like an excited puppy. "Got wiped out by Kirigakure oh, about thirty years back." She grins toothily as she starts walking again. "A bunch of my clan were there; good fighters, the Uzumaki. Challenging. A shame they're not around anymore, really."

Uzumaki Naruto stops wriggling. "Your clan killed my clan?"

"My _village_ killed your clan, on orders from our Kage," Aozame corrects calmly. "My clan liked fighting yours, but orders are orders." She smiles down at him, toothy but mischievous. "Maybe you'll be fun to fight once you're not knee-high anymore."

Naruto perks up instantly. "I'm gonna be _awesome_, Blue-nee, just you wait, dattebyo!"

Shisui finds his voice. "You've got to eat properly if you want to be tall, Naruto-kun," he manages. "Are you eating your vegetables?"

The blond makes a face. "Vegetables are yucky!"

"Then you're going to be a squirt all your life," Shisui retorts cheerfully, acutely aware of their newly-acquired Anbu shadow. Is that Crow-taicho? He's not hiding very hard.

It's definitely on purpose.

But, but _vegetables_!"

"I ate _my_ vegetables," His glorious sea-goddess says mildly, turning a corner. Naruto pauses, taking in how _very_ tall she is and the three Uchiha perched on her shoulders.

"But they taste _yucky,_" he grumbles.

"Then they're not being cooked right." Shisui has to agree there; there's more than one way of preparing vegetables and some of them taste much better than others.

Naruto blinks. "There's more 'an one way to cook vegetables?"

"There really is," Shisui promises. "And with some of them you can't even tell you're eating vegetables at _all_."

"But, but _how_?" The poor squirt looks caught between bafflement and awe.

"Later, Uzu-chibi." Aozame sets the brat down in the empty training ground they'd walked past earlier, then twitches her shoulders; Shisui and Itachi both leap down, Itachi promptly setting Sasuke on his feet.

"Oh hey, you're at the Academy!" Naruto says, actually noticing Sasuke for the first time. "You're in my class! What's your name?"

Sasuke sighs. "I'm Uchiha Sasuke, pleased to meet you," he says politely, even managing a small smile.

"I'm Uzumaki Naruto! I'm gonna be Hokage dattebyo!"

"Are you going to kill the current Hokage?" Aozame asks curiously.

Naruto spins around to stare up at her in shock. "No! I'm not gonna kill Jiji!"

"How are you going to become Hokage without killing the current one?" Shisui is _sure_ his statuesque sea-nymph is teasing the shrimpy blond, but she's doing a very good job of keeping a straight face.

"He's gonna retire! He said so! Why would _anyone_ want to kill Jiji?" The poor brat looks _distressed_.

Aozame shrugs. "Killing's how we change Kage in Kiri; well, outright murder or else death on the battlefield. That's why the Kage tries to keep the rest of the village's top jōnin at arm's length." And, goes unsaid, occasionally arranges suicide missions. "You going to show me what you got, Uzu-chibi?"

Naruto instantly brightens. "Yeah!"

Shisui can't see this going any way but badly, but at least there's three Anbu witnesses in the trees to assure the Sandaime that no, the Uchiha aren't trying to murder the Kyūbi jinchūriki today.

"Can I join in, Aniki?" Sasuke asks, eyes bright and hopeful. Itachi crumples like wet rice paper.

"I'm sure Aozame won't mind, otōto." Seeing as Aozame is now tossing Uzumaki Naruto around with all the amused gentleness of a very large cat humouring a runty kitten, Shisui has to agree there.

Watching Aozame effortlessly tangle the two boys up in each-other and tumble them across the grass, Shisui is suddenly and violently seized by the realisation that one day soon she'll be doing this with _their_ baby.

He has to sit down.


End file.
